Kate Motaung, Carrollton Christian Counseling

Always Abide: Help and Healing for Abandonment

Always Abide: Help and Healing for Abandonment

Kate Motaung2025-04-24T07:29:17+00:00August 30th, 2023|Abandonment and Neglect, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Trauma|

The effects of childhood and adolescent experiences impact our view of self and relationships with others. By default, we tend to follow the example that was provided by those who raised us. Ideal conditions would have furnished the secure attachment, acceptance, and affirmation that fosters what each human needs. Because of abandonment, this doesn’t always happen. Parents and caregivers whose absence or intermittent presence influenced our early lives may not have been equipped to offer it. Their abandonment, which the American Psychological Association (APA) describes as “desertion or substantial leave-taking” delegated custodial responsibilities to us, their dependents. Consequently, abandonment left gaps in our history where our legitimate needs were unmet. Though we have entered adulthood, our wounded inner child still seeks safety, protection, and provision. There is an internal void that wants to satisfy what was lacking from childhood. In an attempt to remedy history, we spend part of our adulthood repeating a variation of the patterns absorbed in our youth. Carrollton Christian Counseling can help you explore these patterns and begin the healing process through faith-based guidance. Our lack of a healthy model for initiating and sustaining relationships left us with a deficit. Without an example based on mutual respect, love, and affection, we need support in learning how to respond to those who desire emotional intimacy and connection. In many ways, we may still experience triggers associated with the pain of a difficult past. It shows up when we engage with spouses, partners, or other loved ones, especially when conflict arises. We may resist the authenticity and vulnerability that forms relationship bonds and not present our true selves. When questioned or challenged, we may feel the need to aggressively defend or withdraw in passivity, either of which can inhibit connection. Perplexed, we may question if we will [...]

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Does My Child Need Counseling?

Does My Child Need Counseling?

Kate Motaung2025-04-24T07:21:27+00:00August 15th, 2023|Christian Counseling for Children, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured|

Many parents struggle with whether their child needs counseling. While they may be facing challenges at home, it can be difficult to recognize what is simply typical child behavior and what things are more than that. For example, if your child is struggling in school, does that mean he or she needs counseling or is it simply an issue regarding academics? Similarly, if your toddler is typically independent and now seems to demand all your attention, is it a phase or does it indicate a bigger issue? These questions can be hard to navigate. Add in the feelings that accompany seeking counseling, dealing with any silent stigma about counseling, and not wanting to think that your child could have something difficult going on, and the decision about counseling can feel paralyzing. Carrollton Christian Counseling understands these challenges and is here to provide compassionate, faith-based support for your family. The most important thing to know Counseling can help. Whether your child is simply in a phase, or he or she is dealing with something more complex, counseling can help. It isn’t a cure, but it can help you and your child navigate whatever they are going through. You can seek help from a counselor even if you don’t know exactly what the problem is or how serious it is. It is similar to how you would seek help from a doctor for your child’s sore ankle about which you’re unsure. The doctor can help you determine what your child needs just like a counselor can help do the same. Signs your child might need counseling While there are no specific things to indicate counseling is needed, there are things you can look for. Certain behaviors can indicate that your child may be struggling with something and they could benefit from [...]

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What is Complicated Grief?

What is Complicated Grief?

Kate Motaung2025-04-24T07:14:21+00:00June 8th, 2023|Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling|

Complicated grief is what people can experience when their painful feelings of loss after a death do not diminish over time. Emotions are so intense that they are not able to recover and readjust to day-to-day life, even if more than a year has passed since the loss occurred. Complicated grief is also called prolonged grief or persistent complex bereavement disorder. The difference between complicated and normal grief Normal or uncomplicated grief describes the typical feelings a person has in the first weeks and months after a loss. Crying, missing the deceased, feeling angry or overwhelmed, depressed, and thinking “If only..” are some examples of normal reactions to loss. Over time, these feelings become less intense (though there may still be instances of acute grief and longing) as the person begins to accept the loss and rebuild his life again, reintegrating into society. Carrollton Christian Counseling can support individuals through this process. Complicated grief, however, is a debilitating condition where a person cannot function properly in everyday life. Types of complicated grief Three types of complicated grief have been suggested by researchers, including chronic grief, delayed grief, and absent grief. Chronic grief is grief that is intense and prolonged and does not ease over time. In severe cases, it can lead to thoughts of suicide or attempts to take one’s own life. Delayed grief is grief that is only felt long after the loss of the loved one. In this case, grief may have been postponed due to feeling numb, in shock, overwhelmed, or even busy. If a person feels that she is not able to grieve openly due to perceived societal pressures. For example, after a miscarriage, a woman might suppress her feelings which later may cause delayed grief to emerge. Sometimes the onset of grief after some [...]

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How to Get the Most Out of Christian Couples Counseling

How to Get the Most Out of Christian Couples Counseling

Kate Motaung2025-04-22T07:18:05+00:00May 5th, 2023|Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Romantic relationships are one type of relationship where we get to express the diverse meanings of the word love. With your spouse, you are friends, you are lovers, and you walk together through all the seasons of life. These relationships will have their moments of beauty, but they will also have bits of ugliness as when the couple is selfish or inconsiderate toward one another. Couples must contend with changes within themselves and their counterpart, holding firm to their commitment to one another through different seasons of life. Challenges arise, and couples deal with these with varying levels of success. Carrollton Christian Counseling can help couples navigate these challenges with faith-based guidance and support. Every couple has its own story of triumphs and struggles, but they also have unique skills and resources with which to address the struggles they face. Couples counseling is an effective tool that a couple can make use of as they work through challenges and different life seasons. If a couple decides to pursue couples counseling, it can help them resolve conflict, address the impact of infidelity or emotional distance, and equip them to address future issues that may crop up. However, when they enter into counseling they must do so with a certain mindset. Counseling only works when people put in the necessary work to improve their relationship. If one is not open to making an effort and doesn’t welcome change and growth, then counseling will not be effective. Below are some pointers on how to get the most out of Christian couples counseling. Optimizing your Christian couples counseling experience Agree to work at it together. When you begin, it may be that only one of you felt the need to go for counseling. That’s okay. But if you both agree to go for counseling, you [...]

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Rising to Meet the Challenge: Bible Verses About Faith in Hard Times

Rising to Meet the Challenge: Bible Verses About Faith in Hard Times

Kate Motaung2025-04-22T07:13:05+00:00April 24th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

When you go through tough times, what keeps you steady? Our lives, no matter how charmed they are, eventually encounter obstacles. When trouble comes, we need to be prepared to weather the storm and thrive despite the unhospitable circumstances we find ourselves in. For the person who believes in God, Bible verses about faith can help them remain grounded while everything is being turned upside down around them. Carrollton Christian Counseling can support you in applying these truths to your life and help you stay rooted in your faith through life’s challenges. Let me know if you'd like it reworded or shortened! It’s no surprise that the Bible has many verses about faith in hard times, not least because God’s people have generally been a minority beset with many hardships. Witnessing the faith of others in such circumstances can strengthen your faith, and understanding the purpose of the trials we face can be a further encouragement when you’re going through a tough time. Understanding faith Contrary to popular belief, ‘faith’, at least according to the Bible, is not believing something without evidence or because no evidence exists. Biblical faith is an entirely different creature because Biblical faith is walking in obedience to what you have already witnessed and experienced. Acting in line with what God has already revealed about Himself and the nature of reality is what Biblical faith is all about. The New Testament writers, for example, urge others to place their faith in Jesus because of who He was and what He did. They witnessed His life, miracles, death, and resurrection. Through Jesus, we got a glimpse of where the world is headed. It is a world in which enemies are reconciled, wounds are healed, where might is not right, where humility and love triumph, and what [...]

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Overscheduled and Overwhelmed: Strategies to Overcome Stress

Overscheduled and Overwhelmed: Strategies to Overcome Stress

Kate Motaung2025-04-22T07:07:40+00:00February 20th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

Our fast-paced world spurs us to hurry and hustle. In real and virtual life, we witness people living what they call their best lives. Sometimes, we attempt to keep up with them instead of seeking God for what He has in store for us, causing us to experience stress. While He has certainly created us with dreams, which we may have fashioned into noteworthy goals, we become overloaded and less effective when we try to match the world’s pace. When we do, we miss ourselves and the value that God wants to add to our lives when we prioritize Him. Carrollton Christian Counseling can help you slow down, refocus, and realign your life with God’s purpose and peace. Fueling frustration. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. – Matthew 6:33, ESV The challenge for us is that we chase “these things,” putting our pursuit into reverse order. Instead of God first, we place Him at the bottom of our endless to-do list. We crave His peace and joy, but we imagine finding it in a hustle-and-grind mindset. Essentially, we can become too occupied to enjoy God and too exhausted to savor His rest. That can induce anxiety, further compounding the effects of the kind of stress that leads to burnout. Stress takes its toll on our physical health in both small and significant ways. However, the wear and tear that it leverages on our mental and emotional states may not be as noticeable but are equally as important. It causes disenchantment when we feel that we are not experiencing the full life that we know Jesus promised (John 10:10). Rarely, do we pause to rest and reassess, preferring to press forward. Instead of bringing this tension between [...]

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How to Get Through the Pain of Rejection

How to Get Through the Pain of Rejection

Kate Motaung2025-04-22T07:01:09+00:00February 9th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

When someone leaves you for someone or something else the pain of rejection can be terrifying. It can feel like you have to live with the awareness that you have been replaced in addition to the loss, hurt, and emptiness you are experiencing. The message in your mind screams: You are no longer good enough. There is someone better. The initial weeks after someone’s departure can be incredibly difficult. In response, people stop eating, stop sleeping, cry, withdraw, and generally feel as if everything is falling apart. Sometimes things feel removed, out of this world, like a character in a play. Disbelief and denial are present. Frequently, one of the hardest things is going to sleep. Agonizing sorrow crosses the mind. The ideas don’t stop. When sleep does come, it often comes in fits. The morning after awakening is no better. The suffering begins all over again with each new day. Rejection. Pushing someone or anything away is a definition of rejection. Rejection from one’s birth family, a friend, or a romantic partner can happen, and the ensuing emotions are frequently traumatic. In daily life, it can be felt in significant or minor ways. Even while rejection is frequently a part of life, some kinds of rejection might be harder to handle than others. The rejection of a spouse, for example, is especially difficult because of the intimacy of the marriage relationship. Even a strained marriage is founded on intimacy. Rejection from a parent is particularly difficult as well since this is a formative relationship in a child’s life. Carrollton Christian Counseling can help you navigate and heal from the pain of rejection, offering support in restoring emotional health and relationships. Being aware of rejection. There are several situations where rejection can happen, but it typically refers to a [...]

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What Does the Bible Say About Depression?

What Does the Bible Say About Depression?

Kate Motaung2025-04-22T06:54:01+00:00January 11th, 2023|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

Although it’s not always possible to find Bible verses directly related to what we’re going through, depression is an exception to that. If you’re wondering, “What does the Bible say about depression?” this article is for you. Of course, a diagnosis of depression didn’t exist in Bible times, but there are many examples of biblical characters suffering from sadness, hopelessness, weariness, and other depressive symptoms, along with passages about how they related to God during their depression. Whether you’re experiencing grief, temporary sadness, situational depression, major depressive disorder, or another form of depression, the Bible offers hope. So while on the one hand, we can ask, “What does the Bible say about depression?” on the other hand we can also look for what the Bible says about hope. They are two sides of the same coin since depression steals our hope and hope can overshadow sadness. The Bible also offers many comforting words about God’s love for us during difficult times in life. Even when we are walking through suffering and sadness, we don’t have to go through it alone. Scripture informs our depression treatment, and it’s the only inspired tool that connects us to God. There are many ways to connect with Scripture, including through music, Christian meditation, prayer, and more. Carrollton Christian Counseling can help you incorporate these practices into your healing journey, offering support rooted in faith and Scripture Keep reading to learn more about a Scriptural approach to depression that is informed by evidence-based therapy techniques. A Definition Here is a clear explanation of depression from Psychiatry.org: “Depression (major depressive disorder) is a common and serious medical illness that negatively affects how you feel, the way you think, and how you act. Fortunately, it is also treatable. Depression causes feelings of sadness and/or a loss [...]

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My Husband is Depressed. How Can I Help?

My Husband is Depressed. How Can I Help?

Kate Motaung2025-04-22T06:23:18+00:00December 12th, 2022|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Men’s Issues, Relationship Issues, Women’s Issues|

Loving someone who is depressed can be hard. Many times, spouses feel helpless as they watch the person they care so much about suffering. It is difficult when all you want to do is help and it feels impossible to know how. If your husband is depressed, perhaps this article will help. Additionally, people who are depressed sometimes release their feelings and frustrations toward the people they feel safe with, often a spouse or a loved one. This can mean you are juggling the longing to help your spouse as well as your feelings about how you are treated. Carrollton Christian Counseling can help both you and your spouse navigate these difficult dynamics, offering guidance to support your relationship and emotional well-being during challenging times. If your husband is depressed, it is not just their struggle. You have your own experiences and feelings to navigate. What is depression? Before you can look at how to help your husband, you need to understand what depression is. According to the Mayo Clinic, “Depression is a mood disorder that causes a persistent feeling of sadness and loss of interest.” Sometimes referred to as major depressive disorder or clinical depression, daily activities can become difficult for those suffering as depression affects how you think, feel, and behave. It is important to understand that being depressed is more than an occasional feeling of sadness or having the blues. It is not something that patients can simply turn off. Depression is a medical condition that requires treatment. Medication, therapy, or a combination of the two often have a positive impact on treating depression. Common signs of depression can include sadness, hopelessness, anxiety, changes in sleep or eating habits, anger, difficulty concentrating or completing tasks, unexplained physical ailments, and even suicidal thoughts. People with depression can [...]

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How to Stop Worrying: Causes and Remedies

How to Stop Worrying: Causes and Remedies

Kate Motaung2025-05-14T15:52:35+00:00November 29th, 2022|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

In order to stop worrying, it is important to recognize that one of the many gifts that the Lord created human beings with is our remarkable capacity for thought. People can think ahead and map out future events in a way that allows them to plan, anticipate potential issues and obstacles and develop strategies to deal with them. Carrollton Christian Counseling can help you use this gift in a healthy, faith-based way to manage anxiety and cultivate peace of mind. This is an amazing capacity that can help a person achieve goals as diverse as getting a college degree, working through a difficult patch in marriage, building a successful business, etc. Being able to think ahead thus helps us to adapt to the world around us and navigate it well. However, at times our minds can be like a hamster wheel, endlessly turning but not going anywhere or doing anything meaningful. Mulling over things that might occur endlessly can leave a person feeling anxious because we are uncertain of the outcome or are afraid of the possibilities that might emerge in the future. When we fear the future possibility of failure, getting injured, or experiencing loss of various kinds, that can generate the mental anguish that we commonly label as “worry.” A simplistic way to think of the distinction between anxiety and worry is that while anxiety mostly affects our bodies, worry tends to reside more in our heads. Worry is closely tied to our efforts to resolve an issue that is uncertain but that carries the potential for negative consequences. And so we can dwell on an upcoming physical exam and find ourselves thinking about all the possible negative outcomes from it. Or if a loved one or colleague leaves us a message with those dreaded words “We [...]

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Kate Motaung

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