Grief is Weird: Unexpected Aspects of the Grieving Process
Grief comes often and in many forms. It is an avoidable part of life. We grieve over people who have died but also over other losses in life. There is anticipatory grief that occurs when someone is expecting a loss and delayed grief when a person suppresses or postpones their emotional response to loss. One thing that is consistent through all types of grief is the weirdness of it all. What does that mean? Grief is weird because it is an unpredictable nuisance that doesn’t follow a pattern. It doesn’t follow a straightforward, linear process like time or even a movie. One day you can feel intense sorrow and the next day you could be feeling fine. A fresh wave of emotion can come again without warning. Grief is weird because it brings about a lot of conflicting emotions. You might be experiencing sadness, but also relief, anger, guilt or even a sprinkling of joy as you recall happy memories. This complex cocktail of emotions often makes people wonder if they are indeed grieving “correctly” or “normally.” Grief can also cause a feeling of disconnection. Those who are experiencing grief can feel out of sync with the world around them. Even though you have gone through a life changing event, the neighbor is just causally mowing their lawn. This disconnection can cause loneliness and make grief even more intense. Grief is weird because it can be triggered so unexpectedly by things that seem mundane, like a song, a scent, or a passing comment. These seemingly benign things can suddenly evoke strong feelings, catching you off guard. Social expectations around how grief “should” look can add another layer of complexity to an already complex emotion. There may be pressure to “move on” quickly or to grieve in private, which can [...]









