Individual Counseling Archives | Carrollton Christian Counseling

Coping with Grief: Grieving Loss and Finding Your Way

Coping with Grief: Grieving Loss and Finding Your Way

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2026-04-10T05:47:21+00:00April 10th, 2026|Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling|

Grief is a painful reality we all must reckon with. It’s not an easy thing to lose what matters most to you, especially the people in your life, and it’s understandable why many struggle to cope well with grief. Coping with grief doesn’t mean denying the loss or even minimizing it or explaining it away. Coping is about learning to live with the loss, being able to carry on while bearing the wounds of separation from a loved one. Grief touches every aspect of who we are, and that includes our emotions, thoughts, bodies, and our spiritual lives. Grieving is the natural process of coming to terms with loss, and it is not a sign of weak faith. Jesus wept (John 11:35) at the tomb of His friend Lazarus, a testimony to how much He loved His friend. The sorrow of loss is all too real, but our ultimate hope is in Christ, even in our grief. Grief as Love with Nowhere to Go How do you begin to deal with grief and the sense of loss? For some, the only way they can see to deal with it is to see grief as a problem to be solved. In this way of thinking, the loss is something to get over as quickly as possible and return to doing life much the same as before. This can be a way of denying the loss, and it can have negative effects on one’s well-being. Another way to look at grief is to see it as a way of working through the significant change that has occurred in your relationship with your loved one. Instead of being a problem to solve, grief then becomes a way of working through the loss by evolving the relationship. Your connection to a lost loved [...]

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Child Behavioral Therapist: Frequently Asked Questions

Child Behavioral Therapist: Frequently Asked Questions

Mccartney Paul, Kate Motaung2026-03-18T06:14:30+00:00March 18th, 2026|Christian Counseling for Children, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Child behavioral therapists are trained mental health professionals who specialize in helping children deal with emotional and behavioral challenges to learn how to function more effectively. Their overall goal is to strengthen desired behaviors, reduce or eliminate unwanted ones, and improve the child’s overall well-being. They help equip the child with adaptive coping skills that enable them to handle frustration and difficult situations in a healthy manner. How can I tell if my child is going through a phase or needs professional help? It can sometimes be hard to know if your child’s behavior requires professional intervention or if it is just a phase he or she is going through. Almost all young children act out occasionally. Some level of defiance, temper tantrums, and testing of boundaries is a normal part of child development. This is especially true during the toddlerhood stage when children are going through the process of learning to express themselves, gain independence, and assert their wills. More persistent or severe issues, however, such as trouble making or keeping friends, or causing frequent disruptions at school, may require the know-how of a professional. Some red flags that require immediate attention and should not be ignored include sudden, dramatic mood or personality changes; destructive behavior such as breaking things or setting fires; uncontrollable anger over seemingly trivial issues; physical aggression toward others; mistreating animals; self-harm; or acting in ways that are inappropriate for their age. What can a child behavioral therapist do to help? A child behavioral therapist can help improve your child’s unwanted behaviors by: Pinpointing what triggers them and why. Helping him or her identify and modify negative thought patterns. Equipping him or her with the necessary skills to handle frustrating circumstances appropriately. Teaching him or her to manage his or her emotions in healthy [...]

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Grief is Weird: Unexpected Aspects of the Grieving Process

Grief is Weird: Unexpected Aspects of the Grieving Process

Stephanie Kramer2026-02-27T17:50:37+00:00February 27th, 2026|Featured, Grief Counseling, Individual Counseling|

Grief comes often and in many forms. It is an avoidable part of life. We grieve over people who have died but also over other losses in life. There is anticipatory grief that occurs when someone is expecting a loss and delayed grief when a person suppresses or postpones their emotional response to loss. One thing that is consistent through all types of grief is the weirdness of it all. What does that mean? Grief is weird because it is an unpredictable nuisance that doesn’t follow a pattern. It doesn’t follow a straightforward, linear process like time or even a movie. One day you can feel intense sorrow and the next day you could be feeling fine. A fresh wave of emotion can come again without warning. Grief is weird because it brings about a lot of conflicting emotions. You might be experiencing sadness, but also relief, anger, guilt or even a sprinkling of joy as you recall happy memories. This complex cocktail of emotions often makes people wonder if they are indeed grieving “correctly” or “normally.” Grief can also cause a feeling of disconnection. Those who are experiencing grief can feel out of sync with the world around them. Even though you have gone through a life changing event, the neighbor is just causally mowing their lawn. This disconnection can cause loneliness and make grief even more intense. Grief is weird because it can be triggered so unexpectedly by things that seem mundane, like a song, a scent, or a passing comment. These seemingly benign things can suddenly evoke strong feelings, catching you off guard. Social expectations around how grief “should” look can add another layer of complexity to an already complex emotion. There may be pressure to “move on” quickly or to grieve in private, which can [...]

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How Shame Can Make Chemical Dependency Worse

How Shame Can Make Chemical Dependency Worse

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2026-02-23T05:26:20+00:00February 23rd, 2026|Chemical Dependency, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Women’s Issues|

If you are dealing with chemical dependency, or know someone who is, you will know just how life-altering the struggle can be. There will be moments when it feels as if things could not get any worse, but sobriety often hinges on your mental attitude toward the struggle. Chemical dependency is a complex and often deeply rooted issue. The hook keeping most people from making progress on their journey to getting clean is shame. Shame blocks progress both for those dealing with chemical dependency and those supporting loved ones through it. Many aspects of life are affected and made worse when we feel ashamed of ourselves and our choices, but this feeling is almost always present for addicts and those trying to get clean. As you try to combat feelings of shame and failure, it can feel a lot like you are swimming against the tide. However, because shame is so often a component of addiction, it is possible to conquer both. In fact, it is difficult to get free from chemical dependency without also getting free from the shame you carry. The Chemical Dependency Iceberg Most people only begin to understand chemical dependency when they have personally struggled with substance addiction or know someone who has. It is easy to judge the surface of the issue, where it seems as if people continually make unwise choices until an undesirable lifestyle ensnares them. The same people who judge and shame addicts and alcoholics often have hidden dependencies of their own. Their personal dependencies and addictions might be more socially acceptable or even praiseworthy, such as being a workaholic or fitness addict. Meanwhile, they have developed these habits as ways of coping with deeper issues. There are a variety of reasons that people develop a chemical dependency, and none of these [...]

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A Different Perspective on Emotional Eating

A Different Perspective on Emotional Eating

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2026-02-07T05:38:09+00:00February 9th, 2026|Eating Disorders, Featured, Individual Counseling|

For the past 60 years or more, our society and culture have been fixated on eating habits, body image, beauty standards, and physical health. There have been fluctuating trends through the decades. One thing that has remained consistent is that people have a lot to say about emotional eating, comfort eating, or stress eating. Emotional eating is often regarded as a weakness or even a moral failure, especially when it centers around fast food or sugar-filled diets. Some go as far as to categorize emotional eating along with eating disorders, showing how misinformed they are on the topic. While there are genuine concerns for national obesity and ailing health, people tend to focus on the wrong thing, creating more emotional issues and anxiety in the process. Every emotional eater is motivated by something. Sometimes they can be negative emotions, but other times, they are natural, harmless, and in some cases, positive, human, and beautiful. There is a glorious combination of food, eating, community, and emotions that is at the core of so many of our experiences. Perhaps it is only when we begin to gain a different perspective on emotional eating that we will conquer some of the underlying issues that require more of our focus, like shame, guilt, and despair. A Different Perspective on Emotional Eating On the surface, eating and emotions seem to have little to do with each other. The only things they have in common are that everyone must eat to stay alive and everyone will experience emotions, some more frequently and more deeply than others. A person might ignore, repress, or misinterpret their emotions, but only people with an eating disorder will ignore, repress, or misinterpret their physical appetite. Food and eating are an essential part of all of our lives, beyond the function [...]

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Fighting Depression: Ways to Cope When You’re Feeling Depressed

Fighting Depression: Ways to Cope When You’re Feeling Depressed

Mccartney Paul, Kate Motaung2026-02-05T06:37:42+00:00February 5th, 2026|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Have you ever heard the expression “You’re your own worst enemy”? You’d think that we always have our own best interests at heart, but that’s not always true. When you’re fighting depression, one of the realities you’ll be confronted with is that your mind can be working against you, and you can be your own worst enemy. It’s important to get the right support and have a clear strategy to deal with depression effectively. When you approach depression as something of a challenge that needs to be managed rather than an enemy that you need to conquer and defeat all at once, you can build effective strategies that promote your resilience and emotional health in the long term. Facing the Key Challenges of Depression As you address depression, an important part of that is to understand what depression is. Depression is a mood disorder, a medical and psychological condition that affects the way you think, feel, and behave in everyday situations. When you struggle to regulate your own emotions and thoughts, you’ll often feel like you’re not yourself. Having depression isn’t a personal weakness or a character flaw. You need to acknowledge that. It’s also important that you educate yourself about how things like your brain chemistry, genetics, stressors, and your environment play a role in depression. By tracking your mood and identifying the triggers that are relevant to you, you can be better prepared to deal with what comes. The key challenges that often come with depression include the fact that you’ll typically experience a loss of energy and motivation. Many people who have gone through depression report feeling tired and unmotivated, to the point where even simple tasks like getting dressed, typing out a message, or meeting a friend for coffee feel overwhelming. Things that once were [...]

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6 Symptoms of ADHD in Adults

6 Symptoms of ADHD in Adults

Mccartney Paul, Kate Motaung2026-01-14T07:22:27+00:00January 14th, 2026|ADHD/ADD, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues, Women’s Issues|

Finding online research about the symptoms of ADHD in adults can be difficult. While there are plenty of articles about symptoms of ADHD in children, the research for adults is limited. However, based on qualitative findings and some quantitative research, here are six behaviors that can signify ADHD in an adult. Possible Symptoms of ADHD in Adults You struggle with restlessness For children, this may look like hyperactivity. In adults, it often feels like an inability to stop fidgeting or perhaps thoughts that run through your mind at a rapid pace. If you find yourself unable to focus on a task because your task makes you think of something else, and then another thought, and then a different thought, this could be a signal of restlessness. Still, other symptoms also need to be present (and comorbidities ruled out) before an ADHD diagnosis can be confirmed. Other symptoms of restlessness might include a fixation on stressful occurrences in your life or others’ lives, getting easily agitated by everyday concerns, or going from frustrated to extreme anger in a short period of time. Restlessness in adults can be a symptom of other issues, so it’s always best to reach out to a counselor at one of our offices to start the diagnostic process. You misplace items frequently Because focus and attention are typically a struggle, one of the symptoms of ADHD in adults that can change from childhood to adulthood is organization. If you were diagnosed as a child, this may mean you did not turn in projects on time, you frequently lost important homework or books, or you had a hard time keeping your room clean. For adults, the struggle with organization can be masked. However, it may be easier for you to recognize if the following “I” statements sound [...]

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How Depression Affects the Whole You: Mind, Body, and Spirit

How Depression Affects the Whole You: Mind, Body, and Spirit

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2026-01-13T06:51:35+00:00January 13th, 2026|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Depression can seem daunting and intense, even scary. Perhaps you’ve wondered whether you or a loved one struggles with depression. Understanding how depression can present and the effects it can have can prove to be empowering. Symptoms of Depression Maybe you’ve been asked a series of questions by a doctor or provider to determine if depressive symptoms are present. Some common depressive symptoms include: Little interest or pleasure in doing things Excessive tiredness/exhaustion Lack of appetite or overeating Feelings of sadness Hopelessness Difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much Negative self-talk/self-esteem Difficulty concentrating Abnormal movement cadence Suicidal tendency Some additional symptoms can be social isolation, lack of motivation, irritability, negative self-talk, negative thoughts about others, or the world. It is important to note that the presence of any of these symptoms does not automatically mean you are depressed. The Whole You Mind, body, spirit – multiple intricate parts make up the whole you. Our Creator made us “fearfully and wonderfully” (Psalm 139:14) in our mother’s womb. Anyone who has studied the human body and all its intricacies can conclude that the body works together to achieve homeostasis. Consider how a “problem” or “issue” in one part of you can affect others. It is common to hear how a defective or weak part of the body can negatively impact another part of the body entirely. The same can be true with mental illness. As we examine the symptoms of depression, let’s look at how other areas of our lives may be feeling the toll as well. The Mind Depression can be a result of improper brain functionality, whether it be a “hardware” or “software” issue. Let’s think of “hardware” as the biological components of the brain and “software” as the thoughts. Both can be contributors to symptoms of depression. Our thoughts [...]

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How Spiritual Coaching Can Help Deepen Your Relationship with the Lord

How Spiritual Coaching Can Help Deepen Your Relationship with the Lord

Kate Motaung2026-03-27T10:46:59+00:00December 30th, 2025|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

Have you ever had one of those moments when you knew what you wanted to do and accomplish, but you didn’t have the foggiest clue how to get started? Life can be like that sometimes. We have the goal clearly in our minds, but the process feels elusive. When it comes to spiritual growth and one’s relationship with the Lord, you can also find yourself aware of your goal, but vague and uncertain about how to get where you want to be. Spiritual coaching can help. One of the benefits of spiritual coaching is that it can help you figure out what your goals are, and it can clarify the steps you need to take to accomplish those goals. This article will explore how spiritual coaching can be an effective tool in your growth and depth of relationship with the Lord. Christian Spiritual Coaching Unpacked The word “coach” will most often conjure images of a sports event, with players on the field and the coach on the sidelines pacing up and down while issuing instructions. That isn’t way off from the mark in describing what a Christian spiritual coach is and does. No one can walk your walk with the Lord for you; only you can do that, empowered by the Spirit. But someone can come alongside you to encourage and guide you on the way. A Christian spiritual coach is a trained individual whose task is to guide others in their spiritual journey. A coach helps others to discover and fulfill the Lord’s purposes for their lives, and they help them to grow their faith. A Christian spiritual coach will use methods such as open-ended questions, reflective listening, exploring Scripture, prayer, meditation, spiritual practices like fasting and journaling, as well as accountability and goal setting. When a spiritual [...]

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Fighting Negative Body Image

Fighting Negative Body Image

Ashlynn Barnette, Kate Motaung2025-12-20T06:38:45+00:00December 22nd, 2025|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Women’s Issues|

Perfect bodies. Perfect hair. Perfect clothing. Everywhere we look, we see society’s ideals of beauty and health. Yet, these ideals are unrealistic. Often, images are edited, filtered, touched up, or created by AI. But the outcome can leave us feeling inadequate and unattractive. Negative body image results in low self-esteem, poor self-confidence, and a dislike of the body and appearance. We stop taking opportunities because of self-consciousness. However, you can learn to fight negative body image and boost body positivity. What is negative body image? Negative body image is how you perceive yourself, often comparing yourself to others or society’s ideals, or listening to judgmental voices of other people. Negative body image can have a major impact on a person’s mental health. It can trigger anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, and a loss of confidence. People with a negative body image may also find it difficult to maintain relationships, especially intimate ones. They may form toxic relationships or distance themselves from their spouse because they feel uncomfortable. Negative body image also contributes to extreme behavior, such as looking at oneself in the mirror excessively and having extreme or numerous cosmetic surgeries to attain a particular look. Even after all of these changes, an individual with negative body image may still feel unattractive. Overcoming negative body image requires acknowledging that there may be something missing, some deeper reason behind the thoughts and fears. Boost positive body image To overcome negative body image, we need to boost positive body image. A positive body image appreciates the body that you have, right now. It acknowledges the body’s capabilities and usefulness. It also makes us more aware of who we are aside from our appearance. When you appreciate your body for where it is now, you feel a sense of confidence and worth. You [...]

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