Individual Counseling

The idea of self-care can often feel unattainable, especially during times of stress, busyness, or when we feel overwhelmed. While we recognize the benefits of self-care, taking time to do things for ourselves feels impossible. When life is busy or we feel burdened, we don’t feel like we can stop and go on vacation or go get a massage. While these self-care activities are good, they often become one more thing we can’t seem to do right. Instead of looking for self-care activities that take us out of our everyday lives, we can find things to incorporate into our lives that bring peace. They may not be things that change what is stressing us out. However, participating in attainable self-care activities can fortify our mental wellness so we can better navigate whatever season we are walking through in life. The key to making this work It’s not about finding the magic thing to do or the dream vacation to take. This is all about keeping things realistic and within reach. They need to be activities that you can incorporate into your life without becoming burdensome. If they are easy to incorporate, you are more likely to do them. Similarly, they need to be things that you enjoy. It’s great to read a list of ideas, but if none of them help you, they are useless. Sometimes it is helpful to try things you wouldn’t ordinarily do. This gives you the chance to discover new activities and their potential benefits in your life. Whatever you choose to do, try it a few times before deciding if it’s right for you. Sometimes you need to settle into how it works or how it makes you feel before deciding if it’s right for you. The great thing about these ideas is that [...]

Who we become is a subtotal of our daily habits. How we choose to live our lives and define who we are is determined by those things we do almost automatically. Habits can be defined as behavior acquired through repetition and happen subconsciously, meaning we do not put any thought into it. Most times we are not aware of what it is we are doing or how it is contributing to our welfare and our lives in general. For us to recognize the power that habits have on our lives, we need to clarify for ourselves which ones we have and whether they are serving us. Carl Jung is quoted to have said, “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” In this statement, he makes the point that habits influence our lives. This influence can either be negative or positive. The hope is that if we are conscious of our them, we give ourselves the ability to continue with those that serve us and whom we want to become and start letting go of those that are distracting. How do habits form? In his book, Atomic Habits, James Clear says, “Success is the product of daily habits, not once-in-a-lifetime transformations.” Our habits are formed and reinforced by what we choose to do each day. The formation of habits is a three-step process according to the Power of Habit, as described by Charles Duhigg (2012). A habit is etched in our neuropathways due to this three-step process called the habit loop. It starts with a cue, then a routine, and finally a reward. Below is a simpler explanation of how this works: Cue This is the first part of habit formation. A cue is a trigger that prompts us into [...]