Relationship Issues

9 Different Ways People Feel Abandoned

, 2025-04-03T05:40:32+00:00April 3rd, 2025|Abandonment and Neglect, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Abandonment looks different from person to person. People frequently second-guess themselves. They might question if their perception of events. Likewise, they may feel as if they are overly sensitive when others who experienced the same event were not affected in the same way. Sometimes it is the events that seem to be so ordinary and commonplace that cause people to feel the deepest stabs of abandonment. Everyday Abandonment People often imagine that violent or extreme events cause trauma. However, people frequently experience abandonment trauma from subtle things they experience in relationships. These things can seem so slight, or even hard to identify, that we often overlook them, or even make excuses for them. This leads to us feeling as though we shouldn’t feel a sense of abandonment, or that we are being overly sensitive. For example, you may have a friend who cancels plans at the last minute. They gain reputations for being unreliable, and other friends might joke about their inability to commit to anything. They might have a deep reason for being this way, and because their behavior is predictable and joked about, we might make excuses for them or dismiss our frustrations with them. However, if we are honest with ourselves, we might find that we feel more than frustration with them. Their constant cancellation of plans makes us feel less important to them, and we feel like we can’t rely on them anymore. Sometimes it is the common, everyday behavior that friends, family, and loved ones do that makes us feel abandoned. These are difficult things to confront because we can feel self-conscious that we are overreacting to the situation. It is only as we begin to confront our feelings honestly, and share these feelings with the relevant people, that we can find healing from [...]

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Advice for Newlyweds in Carrollton: Embrace Independence

2025-03-26T10:13:26+00:00March 24th, 2025|Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Looking for advice for newlyweds in Carrollton, Texas? This may seem counterintuitive, but it works. If marriage is all about unity and becoming one with your partner, why would any sensible therapist tell you to embrace independence? While being a Christian couple in Carrollton means unifying and becoming one in Christ through marriage, it does not mean you should completely abandon the unique individual God made you to be. It’s important to create personal space and maintain a degree of separation from your partner. In the Bible, the concept of a married couple becoming “one” is introduced in Genesis 2:24: “Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” This phrase is significant and is echoed throughout Scripture including in the New Testament by Jesus in Matthew 19:5 and by Paul in Ephesians 5:31. The most immediate and literal meaning is the physical and sexual union between husband and wife. In marriage, couples join together in an intimate relationship that is both exclusive and binding. But beyond the physical aspect, becoming “one flesh” also signifies emotional and spiritual unity. Marriage is intended to be a deep and loving relationship where individuals support and understand each other on a profound level. Furthermore, in becoming “one flesh” the couple develops a shared identity and purpose. They are no longer two separate individuals but are united in their common goals, values, and direction in life. This unity does not erase individuality but rather complements and enhances it. In Ephesians 5:31-32, Paul draws a parallel between the union of husband and wife and the relationship between Christ and the Church. The marital relationship is intended to reflect the sacrificial love, unity, and commitment that Christ has for His Church. As Christians, [...]

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5 Good Boundaries to Draw With People Who Have Caused Trauma

, 2025-03-10T04:45:12+00:00March 10th, 2025|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Trauma|

One of the most critical aspects of our emotional freedom is to forgive those who have hurt us. This is especially true for people who have suffered trauma or abuse. A person with a traumatic past may need the help of forgiveness to move past it and thrive in their lives. However, just because a person has forgiven someone does not mean they need to give them access to their lives. Good Boundaries to Draw With Causers of Trauma Boundaries help people limit access to interaction with them and what they can know about them. A person who wants to protect themselves from suffering trauma again needs to draw proper boundaries with that person. Here are five good boundaries to draw with people who have caused trauma: Time Boundaries Limit the amount of time you spend with a person. If you see that person regularly, limiting the time you spend talking with that person is essential. A person who has subjected you to trauma and is not repentant may quickly come back to that topic and cause you pain and harm by denying the behavior even existed. This can re-trigger the pain you are trying to get past. Furthermore, a person who has subjected you to trauma wants to know more about you. By spending more time with you, they can learn more details about your life. Draw a reasonable time boundary and limit their time with you or your loved ones. Space Boundaries Similarly, limit or restrict their ability to get close to you. A person who is close to you in proximity can try to hug you or, even worse, abuse you. To protect yourself, you need to draw a space boundary. Give yourself some physical distance between yourself and the person who has caused you trauma. [...]

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How to Find Support and Healing After Infidelity

2025-02-04T06:21:33+00:00February 4th, 2025|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Infidelity and Affairs, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Infidelity in a relationship can be a challenge to recover from. A person can be unsure about pursuing forgiveness and restoring the marriage to what it once was. The discovery of infidelity not only feels as though life has imploded, but it can also feel as though the entire marriage has been a farce, making healing after infidelity difficult. Healing after infidelity begins with the most challenging part: forgiveness. Until a person finds a way to let go of the bitterness, there will be no peace in any of the decisions that are made. Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times. Matthew 18:21-22, ESV There are many ways to pursue healing after infidelity. This pursuit begins with making an intentional choice to heal regardless of what may seem to be ruined. Just as with any other process, it is important to recognize what the goal is and to get clarity about that goal. These four important questions may help you take the first step in healing after infidelity. Can you forgive your partner? Can you become committed and trust your partner again? Have you released the anger toward your partner? Can you move forward? After asking yourself these questions, it is time to begin taking steps to heal. Recovering the Relationship Each relationship is different and special. It revolves around the people involved, and it is specific to how they relate to each other. This means that recovery after infidelity is different for each couple. While it may look different, there are phases that relationships typically experience as they engage in the healing after [...]

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How to Walk Alongside Your Depressed Husband

, 2025-01-07T03:58:54+00:00January 6th, 2025|Couples Counseling, Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Men’s Issues, Relationship Issues|

Seeing a person we love going through a hard time is heart-wrenching. We want to do all we can to love them, to make them feel loved, supported, and understood. It is possible in many situations – especially that of a depressed husband – to begin to feel powerless, especially when our presence does not seem to be making a difference. In this and other situations, remember that your empathetic presence by itself can make a difference, and you must hold onto that when it seems otherwise. If your husband is struggling with depression, you may not know how to be that empathetic presence for him. On the other hand, you may wonder if what you are doing is making a difference. Hopefully, the words below will encourage you in your journey with your depressed husband. Supporting a Loved One with Depression Depression is a common mental health problem that afflicts people from all walks of life, all genders, cultures, and ethnic backgrounds. It can afflict those whom we may perceive as strong. It is often shocking for many wives to see their husbands bowed down by depression. As with any other condition or situation, one of the first ways you can function as a meaningful support is to understand what it is your husband is dealing with. Depression is a mood disorder that affects how a person feels, thinks, and functions in daily life. Something is going on not only in the person’s body but also in their mind and brain chemistry as well. Often, depression is signaled by feelings of intense sadness which last for weeks and months. It can be tempting to think that your depressed husband just needs to push through this and get to the other side. Depression requires treatment, and it does not [...]

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Cultivating Healthy Expectations In A Relationship

2025-02-20T18:02:16+00:00December 26th, 2024|Featured, Personal Development, Relationship Issues|

Listen to this article It’s been said that if you aim for nothing, you’re likely to hit it. If you have no goals, and if you hold no expectations, that might mean that you won’t be disappointed, but it might also mean that what you get won’t be good, either. Having expectations of a given situation can be a dangerous exercise because of the possibility of disappointment and frustration, but without them, it’s also possible to wind up being taken advantage of. According to the Cambridge Dictionary, an expectation is the feeling or belief that something will or should happen. In a relationship, your expectations are typically about the behaviors and attitudes that you believe or feel your partner should have toward you. It’s about how you would want to be treated, and how you want to treat the other person. Do Relationships Need Expectations? Whether we like it or not, we come into every situation with some kind of expectation about how we will be, and how we would like others to be toward us. Those expectations may be low, and they may be either healthy or unhealthy, but they are there. Often, one way to know if you had expectations of some kind in a situation is by noticing if you feel disappointed when something happens or fails to happen. A healthy relationship needs healthy expectations because every relationship carries expectations of some kind. Even a parent-child relationship, in which a parent unconditionally loves their child carries certain expectations. For instance, a parent who loves their child unconditionally can and should expect to be shown respect and kindness by their child. Having expectations in a relationship helps you set a standard for how you want to be treated in that relationship, as well as letting [...]

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Connecting Well with Others: Relationship Advice for Women

, 2024-11-13T11:06:17+00:00November 6th, 2024|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Women’s Issues|

The greatest treasure in our lives is not all the stuff we have, including our homes, jobs, wealth, or looks. To be sure, those things all have their place in our lives, but the value they possess is limited. Rather, what is of greatest value is our relationships. these relationships can be with our friends, neighbors, siblings, and other family members, or our romantic partners. When these relationships are of a good quality, that impacts your overall well-being in a way little else can. “Stuff” is best enjoyed when it’s shared with your loved ones. It should come as no surprise that your relationships are of such importance. For one thing, people are deeply social and relational beings, something we get from our Heavenly Father. In the beginning, God created human beings in His image and likeness. That can mean many different things, including taking care of our world, but it also means there’s something about us that images God. God is love (1 John 4:16), and love is all about rich, deep, truthful, and healthy relationships with others. If the God we reflect is eternally Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, then it makes all the sense in the world that we are relational creatures too. Our overall well-being is intimately tied to our relationships. A person who has healthy, positive, and supportive relationships has a greater likelihood of being happier and healthier. Life isn’t always sunny, and we often encounter hardships such as death, losing a job, or struggles with our health. That’s why developing and maintaining good connections with other people matters. When we are going through hard times, those relationships can also help us to combat loneliness and improve mental health issues such as stress and anxiety. Some relationship advice for women Your relationships matter, and you [...]

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How to Improve Communication in a Relationship: Fun Communication Games

2024-09-25T10:19:16+00:00August 29th, 2024|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Experts frequently emphasize the importance of communication in relationships. Just because communication is a cornerstone of quality relationships doesn’t mean that it can be fun. Incorporating communication games into your routine can make the process of communication both enjoyable and effective. They can also help you improve your communication skills and enhance your relationships. Fun Communication Games Two truths and a lie: Couple’s version Share three statements about yourself – two of those statements being truthful and one being a lie. Then your partner must guess which statement is a lie. This game encourages sharing personal stories and helps you learn more about each other in a fun way. For new couples, this can be a great way to get to know each other and improve communication. If you have been with your partner for a while, consider making the statements more about how you feel or dreams you might have since they are likely to know a lot about your past. The question game Take turns asking each other intriguing or thought-provoking questions. These questions can range from “What is your favorite childhood memory?” to “If you could have dinner with any historical figure, who would it be?” The goal is to spark meaningful conversations and discover new things about each other. You can also learn more about your partner’s career or personal goals and priorities through this game. Compliment tag Just like in the traditional game of Tag, you and your partner will take turns tagging each other. But in this version of the game, you will be giving each other genuine compliments rather than a tag on the arm. This game will boost positivity and reinforce appreciation and affection in the relationship. The compliments can be general or specific. Mention how much you like their new [...]

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5 Ways to Help Your Partner Overcome Compulsive Buying

2024-09-25T08:32:28+00:00July 19th, 2024|Coaching, Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Popular media depicts many examples of compulsive shoppers; typically young, easygoing men and women obsessed with the latest clothes, jewelry, shoes, and bags. The sad truth is that compulsive buying is a disorder that can affect even the most unlikely people. You may even be surprised to discover that your partner is a compulsive shopper right under your nose. Unlike most addictions, compulsive buying may be easier to hide and easier to dismiss than other disorders. After all, the reason we fight to cure our loved ones from other addictions like drug, alcohol, sexual, or gambling addictions is that they openly hurt sufferers in obvious ways. Buying too much stuff doesn’t hurt anyone, does it? How compulsive buying can harm your relationship While it may be normal to give in to the occasional impulse to shop, it becomes a problem when some glaringly negative changes in someone’s spending habits appear. Just like any other addiction, compulsive shopping can become harmful, especially for relationships. Compulsive buying can be damaging if: It strains the family budget. It hinders paying bills on time. They open new credit accounts to allow for more shopping. They keep the excessive purchases secret. They prefer to shop over facing real emotions like anger, sadness, or loneliness. It alienates friends and family because they are preoccupied with shopping. Countless studies have noted that financial problems rank as one of the top causes of divorce, so it is important to help each other recognize this addiction in one of you before it destroys the fabric of your relationship. If you think your loved one is showing these telltale signs of compulsive buying or shopping addiction, you need to acknowledge it and start working toward getting them help. How to help your partner Give constant positive encouragement Point out [...]

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The Dynamics of Codependency

2024-09-25T08:31:30+00:00July 15th, 2024|Codependency, Couples Counseling, Featured, Relationship Issues|

Codependency is a toxic dynamic in a relationship where two people become locked into a giving-and-taking imbalance. This means that one person (the giver) pours their energy, time, and resources into supporting the receiver or “enabler.” The giver needs to be needed, and the enabler needs to be in a position of primary importance in someone else’s life. There are varying degrees of severity with codependent relationships, but the result is usually two people trapped by each other and descending into bitterness and resentment. Recovery from codependency is possible, and it begins with self-reflection and awareness. Sometimes people need to see where they need help or healing to undo damaging situations, they have gotten themselves and others into. The giving flaws The givers in codependent relationships usually begin with people pleasing and pacifying from a young age. They are often highly empathetic people who derive genuine joy from making others happy. However, underlying this generous spirit is often a wound of feeling not good enough, unseen, or unworthy of affection. By nature, givers do not acknowledge or confront issues. They might be aware of problems with their self-esteem but will default to being the good friend, or the kind stranger to receive compliments, praise, and affection. This behavior might seem pleasant on the outside, but deep down it is subtly manipulative. What about enablers of codependency? In some ways, the enabler is the inverse of the giver. They appear more confident, less uncertain, and more obviously controlling. The giver comes to rely on the other person in the codependent relationship for their outspoken opinions, decisiveness, and perceived superiority. Where the giver’s motive is to people please, the enabler has a motive that is simply to have someone meet their needs. Their self-importance is often rooted in narcissism, and they will [...]

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